Dating menopause

Why life begins after the menopause: 'I left my husband and found a toyboy'

H ere we speak to four women about accomplishing lifelong dreams in later life….

I tried to ignore how I felt and carry on. I hosted dinner parties, paid the mortgage and raised my three children with my husband. My husband moved out, and the children and I stayed in the family home in south-west London.

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I loved the freedom. I arrived at the pub and he greeted me with a big smile. I laughed all night and we saw each other a couple more times. Though it never progressed beyond conversation, I had a lot of fun. Just as with divorce, you can be a victim of menopause or use it as a springboard.

I have a lot more energy. But by , I was running out of steam. I was 55 and exhausted. Friends thought I should retire.

1. Be prepared for the long haul

I started to think about my purpose in life It is no coincidence that this all came about during the onset of my menopause. I reminded myself that my life was far from over and I had to enjoy every moment. F lowers had been my passion since I was a child. My dad used to take me on walks in the Sussex countryside and I would pick little bunches to bring home. Even at the modelling agency I dabbled in flower arranging — I created bouquets for shoots, rather than buying them, to cut costs — so I decided to start a flower business.

I loved it from the start. The business took off quickly. I also had tremendous fun with a recent installation for the Mayfair restaurant Sketch. We hung 6, delphiniums upside down from a ceiling for five weeks. I worried that they would die, but it looked incredible.

Straight, Single, and Sixty: The Truth About Dating After 55

Admittedly, there have been some disasters. I worried the table would collapse too, but I grabbed on to a branch and stabilised myself just in time. Even so, it was terrifying.

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My dad used to take me on walks in the Sussex countryside and I would pick little bunches to bring home. In bed, take the emphasis off intercourse and let go of orgasm-mania from your twenties and thirties. Please support our fact-based journalism today. The menopause has caused me to lose weight and I have a leaner look than I did in my 20s. Neither time do they offer to come back or even give me a goodnight snog.

W hen I started going through the menopause, I stopped and re-evaluated my life. I went on to start my own business selling bedding, tablecloths and mugs with special pens that allow you to draw on the material and wash off your designs. M y family were concerned about how I was going to make it work, especially my father who was a lawyer and very careful with money.

Straight, Single, and Sixty: The Truth About Dating After 55

When my first batch of 1, duvets arrived from China, they were all horribly crumpled so friends helped me iron them. It took days, but it was worth it. I have lots of ideas for the future. Had about six years of a wonderful sex life -- at last! Then menopause hit and that was it. Sex became excruciating and libido packed up shop two years later though sex only happened three to four times as we tried to see if there was any way to make it work. Doctors were no help. The only option they offered was HRT which she was afraid of due to the likelihood of encouraging breast cancer.

I'm eight years younger than my wife and frustrated as hell with no one to be angry at.

A Man's Guide to Menopause

I'm grateful to have met my wife and for the brief time where I did have a satisfying love life, but God, it's been a tough road to hoe since then. I have to say, the letters you've gotten from couples bragging about "no problems here" do read like Penthouse Forum -- unbelievable, given my experience. My wife and I are in our early 70s, married 44 years and deeply, emotionally in love. My wife took HRT and avoided nearly all menopause symptoms, but at some point she lost interest in her own orgasms.

First things first

Sex became all about intimacy and focused on my orgasm. She sometimes experiences brief pain on penetration which can be minimized by lube , gentleness, and angle. We're slowing down, but continue to make love five or six times a month, for which I am so very, very grateful. She is a sweetie. I'm 70 and my wife is We had great sex through menopause. She was in perimenopause for many years. When she got to about 65 it started to change. Intercourse became painful for her and she developed an allergy to semen.

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Now intercourse is out of the question and she has no desire for anything other than hugs. Needless to say, I'm not happy.

I'm still very much attracted to her and still have desire for sex in our lives every couple weeks. I guess I should be grateful to even be alive. I was 28 and recently separated when I met J, who was also recently separated. She was beautiful, smart, fun-loving, wise, and she had led a fascinating life. Her remarkably fit body was the result of an ongoing commitment to ballet workouts. She also was years-old.

Over the next eight years, we enjoyed a wonderful life together, including a rich and varied sexual relationship.