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While dating is always full of ups and downs, it doesn't generally involve training exercises, lengthy deployments and military lingo -- a foreign language if you don't do some research.
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Marines might have a reputation for being rough, tough fighters who are fiercely dedicated to their band of brothers, but each Marine also has his own individual personality. If you can focus on building a solid relationship, maintaining a connection with others and keeping your own needs in mind, you and your partner will be off to a good start. Discuss areas of contention and relationship issues as they arise. Be prepared for relationship stress before a deployment, which can lead to arguments and fights, cautions Lieutenant Colonel Simon Pincus and his colleagues in "The Emotional Cycle of Deployment: A Military Family Perspective.
You can help to reduce stress and fighting by talking about your mutual expectations for when your partner is away in areas such as independence and male-female relationships, advises Pincus. Pursue your own hobbies and interests, signing up for spinning classes, enrolling in a woodworking workshop or getting involved in volunteer opportunities.
Stay in contact with your support group when your Marine is home and turn to others in similar situations through online support or groups on base. While Family Readiness Groups FRGs were once reserved for married spouses of Marines, these unit organizations provide a support network, family and holiday events and information while Marines are away on deployment and now welcome other forms of partners, too, explains a United States Army article "Family Readiness Group Defined.
Spending months apart can be difficult on a relationship, but you can help to ease the strain by staying in touch while your partner is away.
Talk on the phone or through video chat as much as possible. Fill a care package with his favorite goodies and personal items.
Add photos of you and the two of you together in photo albums, scrapbooks or on a coffee mug so he can share his morning with you. Or that they were interested in the status implied by medals, ribbons and shiny brass buttons. I wonder if the advantage military men have in online dating is something more prosaic.
Last weekend at a Dining Out, one third of the couples at our table met each other online. These women said that the military guys they dated on line were more likely to call them back. They called when they said they were going to call. But the more I listened to their stories, the more I heard how these particular guys were really seeking a life partner. That they had a deployment or a move coming up.
They were time constrained. Could that also be a factor? Hard to be sure. If you and your service member met online, did you give them an edge because they were military?
Tell us your story. When it comes to finding a life partner, chances are that we will be doing more of that on the Internet, what factors do you think are most important? And what have I missed?
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