Rules to dating my daughter

Rules For Dating My Daughter T-Shirts

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Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you. Rule Five: It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter.

Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry. Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool.

Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat.

Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay.

10 Rules for Dating my Daughter T-shirt / Myfatherdaughterstore

Old folks homes are better. Rule Nine: Do not lie to me.

I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house.

Do not trifle with me. Rule Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home.

Dads Against Daughters Dating T-shirt (ALSO HAS 10 RULES ON BACK)

As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine. Shoot, I still get the evil eye from here dad once in a while, and we've been married almost 11 years.

Now then I've got a 5-year old daughter and a 3-year old daughter. I'll be saving this for the next 15 years at least, it'd better be at least 15 years before they even think about dating , and giving copies to any potential suitors of my daughters!!! Tom at MSY.

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But Nine gets me too! I had a girls father hand me this list one very similar when he first met me. It was pretty damn funny. I had another girl's mother tell her to watch out for me, as "he's been around the block a few times.. He told me he went to Camp Perry every other year, and was on the local marksmanship team.

He was little chagrined when I brought my own national match M1A and did better than him with a long gun at the meter TVA range. I couldn't shoot any farther, though, as we had open sights and I can't really see much farther All this for me Notice there is no photo. Girl's parents always liked me.

10 Rules for Dating my Daughter

I've never had any problems. The nice guy role works very well for me. God only knows how over-protective I'm gonna be when I have a little girl. He needs not to worry. Do tell. How many of those rules have you broken. Heres the conversation You said you do WHAT with rich republican girls?!?! I do you a favor, son, you have fifteen seconds to get out of range, so RUN!! I mean you still can't date any daughters I might ever have She'd kick you narrow ass if you got out of line.

I am not interesting in hooking up with any A. Unless the are hot of course!

Rules for Dating My Daughter

She'd wear you out and leave you on the clothesline to dry out. And thats from the housework shed make you do.

I never honk. Young daughters are hypersexualized while adult daughters are infantilized. Daughters of all ages are consistently used as a prop for machismo. Recent studies have shown that men get less sexist when they have daughters.

However, that is only in regards to promoting gender equality in the workplace. Perhaps someday the absence of sexism will be less surprising than expected.

2. If you text it, I may read it.

Perhaps someday it will not take a male voice in order for conversations on equality to be heard. I'm not raising my little girls to be the kind of women who need their daddy to act like a creepy, possessive badass in order for them to be treated with respect.

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