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Try doing quiet activities together.
An introvert needs to re-charge their social energy fairly often. In order to spend the time you want to with your partner or potential partner, you may need to engage in quiet or separate activities side-by-side. You can spend quality time together without stressing your introvert. When the movie is over, discuss it at their leisure. Give your partner alone time during long periods of socializing. Your partner will probably need to slip away from a party or group setting every so often to recharge.
Oftentimes, even a ten-minute break break from large gatherings, public spaces, or rambunctious activities will be enough for an introvert to bounce back into the action.
Instead, trust that they will come back when they are ready. Instead of a large dinner party or gala, invite one or two other friends over to your house. Introverts thrive in one-on-one settings and small gatherings, which give them a chance to make personalized connections and be heard over the din of extroverted group settings.
Avoid loud, crowded places. Introverts can become over-stimulated when faced with boisterous and bustling environments. They may seem distant, aloof, or distracted, but this is because they are trying to cope with external stimuli, rather than being able to focus solely on you.
Chances are, they will take the opportunity to recharge, and you will both have a better time because of it. Actively engage an introvert in a group discussion. Introverts tend to space out, or disengage in group discussions or functions. Try asking them a question directly, to bring them back into the group. They will appreciate your directness, and the thought that you want them to feel included.
Avoid questions with "yes" or "no" answers. Try to get the person to open up a little with questions that begin: Pay attention to their facial expressions and body language. Introverts will not always say what they are thinking. A small, forced smile may be a sign to back off.
If their arms are folded across their chest, they may not be in the mood to talk to anyone.
If they adjust their posture or position to mirror yours, it means that they are focused on you and feeling engaged. Introverts tend to dislike being the center of attention, and over-complimenting someone draws a lot of attention to their body and personality. So, take it easy and say what feels natural, rather than overwhelming your date with forced, expected, or stock compliments.
Talk with depth as well as breadth. Introverts hate small talk, and will react much more positively to a conversation that has some depth or personal connection to you. Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. Already answered Not a question Bad question Other. Tips Be friendly, but not forceful. If you are afraid that you are making someone uncomfortable, just ask, "Am I making you uncomfortable? Tell me if I am, and I promise I won't be offended.
These things do not necessarily indicate that anything is wrong, like it may for extroverts. Remember that introverts are great listeners and will pay attention to what you say and do. I was meted out a few hours a week for us to spend time together. Introversion might not be the issue. Being introverted does not mean you get to be an unresponsive, minimally committed partner and expect your mate to accept and understand. You still are part of the relationship. You still need to be mature and loving.
Thanks for making your point. Thanks for your response.
How long do you think I can wait before I reach out to him? I was thinking of waiting out a week to 10 days before I reach out again.
Would that be sufficient time for him to recover? I really enjoyed hanging out with him and honestly if I can be friends with him, I would trade anything to have that. As a side, when introverts get angry and yell, is it usually a lucid argument or do they do they say things on the spur of the moment? Sometimes extroverts in this case me can say things out aloud when they are upset but not always rational, and at a later point they reassess and come to think differently.
You were seeing each other for a few weeks? I would wait a week or so, then contact him. Introverts generally think before speaking but if they are highly stressed they may lash out without fully formulating their words.
Sorry I cut off my previous message to you. Thanks for writing this beautiful article. However his communication dwindled over the last week and being the very social extrovert I am, it got me all angsty coz I misconstrued his silence for not being interested. I do however like him a LOT, as a friend the physical intimacy is also amazing and am hoping he will give me a second chance. Is there any way I can get his to respond to my communication and in the process not anger his anymore? Also, are introverts known to change their mind and reinitiate communication? I always caution giving up too much of who you are for a partner.
He may have felt your energy and frequent communication as overwhelming. I would give him space and time and then approach him softly by sending an email or text saying you would like to at least maintain a friendship.
I would start there, but for now, it sounds like he wants a break from you.: Seeking your thoughts on a current situation. This led to a mistake I made of having that up-front conversation about how I felt. While hanging out one night I just decided to confront her about it. I told her how I felt and that I was hoping there could be something more to our connection. Fast forward a few days and I just feel horrible. We still talk, but much less frequently. Reading your blog I feel that I was giving her positive energy and she was doing the same to me, but now I feel like a burden.
Should I not bring that event up again and just slowly work on developing our friendship again? Or should I straight up apologize for putting her in an awkward situation? It was honest, vulnerable and worth taking the chance to find out her feelings. Introverts like to be prepared.
You probably did catch her off guard. Let the situation settle down. My gut says slowly rebuilding the friendship is the way to go. Be kind and friendly but not overtly flirty.