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I have been too chicken to go on dating sites etc. I know it is all up to me to make that hapen.
I am going to give you some tips for dating after divorce in your 30s. But before I get into it, I just want to let you know that being in your 30s. To my pleasant surprise, my something jadedness confidence combined with the dawn of casual online How to Know If You're Ready to Date After Divorce.
I mean no man is going to be knocking on my door asking me for a date eh? However, aventino I think you will have no problem dating here since you are a man, even if you have kids. For women I think it is slightly more harder, but I could be wrong and just using that as an excuse. Put up a personal add anyway, though I think most women don't read the mens personal adds and just rely on replies to their own adds.
Other thing I have just realised is that the person who used to stop me buying fashion disasters when I went out clothes shopping isn't in my life anymore: S 10 yrs ago KAT8, very nice of you to say that and you're right it is easiesr for men in general with kids t to get a date than women with kids. I think, in my opinoin the more women you can meet and talk to just talk Maybe you ask some of your mates who regularly go out on weekends.
I did it the old fashoined way. Met her, went out on dates and so on I always said to myself I need to find someone to grow old with not because of. I wish all the luck in finding someone you can share your life with. I think I simply need to do more action and less talking. The more I get out socialising the more I meet and the more I meet the more I get out socialising.
S 10 yrs ago That's the spirit my friend, double thumbs up for you. I'm telling there are women who are actually looking for the real deal Since you're a strong believer in LOVE and still have faith in it, it's just a question of time.
I'm rooting for you. Vulvic 10 yrs ago Aventino and KAT8 - you are both right, need to get out there and be more proactive in meeting people. I guess I have got lazy over the years, have been in HK a long time and know a lot of people but nobody that falls into the category of potential date. Time to try something new. I am not sure if I am ready to post on the personals though, still feeling a bit reluctant to put myself across that way. Can't understand why as a ratio there are so few in Hong Kong. Hkfrenchie, we will see, even if I don't make a connection for a while, every time I go out is good for me.
Since I'm looking for a single mum and since the stamp on the forehead "I Got Kids" idea for when you go out dating hasn't taken off yet, the internet maybe is initially more useful than getting out. Vulvic 10 yrs ago Lol, sounds like my ex. That's my worry, the scumbags. I fear my 'bullshit' detecor may be a little off after so little practice. I have a 5 year old and I'm happy to add to it but there is a big difference timewise between meeting someone with a child a similar age and having more with someone who hasn't got any yet.
S 10 yrs ago aventino, i hear you but do bear in mind that whether you end up in a relationship with a single mom or a single lady both comes with pros and cons. Vulvic 10 yrs ago If you have a child, why on earth would you advertise yourself as anything else.
If we have to start lying to get dates then frankly I'd rather not have any. It may come as a shock to some of you but not of all us want to date out of age group. Whilst dating a young something might be fun in the beginning, it can get old pretty quick.
Likewise, if you have a child, there is some comfort in dating someone in a similar situation. You have shared experiences and understand the sacrifices it takes to be a parent. It is interesting reading everyone's viewpoints. I agree that one should not set too many restricting factors.
IMHO i also think that although tempting we shouldnt be looking too hard - would hate to think that we all come across as desperate! Having said that, I will be out tonight though with another single mum - send me a message if you might also be out and want to sms me to meet for a drink. Vulvic 10 yrs ago , if you are planning a get together, wouold also like to join. Will PM you in a bit. Hoyo - you miss a very important point. Most women in HK, especially the single mums, are well able to support themselves financially as well as their children.
Meeting a man with a sizeable income is of no interest to me, as long as he knows how to have a laugh, is honest and treats me and my daughter with respect that's a pretty good start. It says something about the calibre of women that you are meeting if you labour on the point of money and being able to provide.
I agree with - all this harping on about what kind of person we would like to meet is a bit desperate. Personally I'd just like to get out of the house once in a while and have a bit of fun. Most of my friends are married with kids and are not always available for a night out and I would not expect them to be. Vulvic 10 yrs ago Why on earth would you bother dating these women if they only expect you to pay the bills? I think you might be in need of some dating advice too Hoyo, there are plenty of women in HK who are financially independent and happy to pay their way.
Would love to meet but as I'm away Sat night through Monday night I always spend the night before I go at home doing dad stuff with him. So that rules out Friday.
Sounds like fun though. Count me in for Wednesday. Vulvic 10 yrs ago Weds night sounds good, would also like to join. See you all there. Do we need to carry something so we recognise each other Justin Credible Part Deux 10 yrs ago My advice to newly single dad? You may say you are not looking for ONS' but I suggest you get them out of the way for the first year before you go about trying to "get a relationship"! Honestly, you are, at the moment, still in need of a mending and a bit of distance from your past relationship. Anything you pick up right now will only end in pieces as it would be that perfect bandaid to bring you your confidence back and once you do get it you will see that the rebound love was just that Mend your nets first I mean, what are you hoping for?
Sheesh, you saw how you succeeded last time, take it easy and dont go into anything deep and meaningful until you know who you are Hans SOLO, and you know what you want. There's a happy world out there for the divorcee Just be smart about it and keep your eyes open. Justin Credible Part Deux 10 yrs ago Prolly not Dont try to get that random wannabe chump to fit your expectations. Settle for nothing less! Initially I sat there all "woe is me" who will want me with my shambles of a house and my kidlet in tow?
Meehhhh, there are people out there who will be good and all you have to do is learn you rock and you deserve someone awesome. Believe it and it will happen. Takes time, but trust me, it will! If you stumble and fall, just pick yourself back up! Lots of idiots out there, but take some comfort in knowing that the non-kidded up folks are also dating idiots or a fairly high calibre. It has nothing to do with you being a single parent I can see it is about finding someone for you, but I would argue that your child isn't an extra bonus because your new partner needs to get along well with the child or there's no point in a relationship with them.
The child is more of a part of your personality that anyone you find must have compatability with. So i would say it has alot to do with being a single parent as it carries alot of responsibility in your choice of future partners with it. I explained my reasons for wanting to date a single mum so I won't labour them here, though I think we all agree we need to get out and get looking for what we want. It's a common need that's true for anyone wanting another relationship.
I am single and dont mind to start a relationship with someone who divorced or have kids, but seems really hard to get into a LTR Perhaps people wanna short term one nowadays But I am sure you can find your life partner soon Its matter of time and fate I think I've been given a new lease on life to meet and explore more people and things since I've been separated.
I do sense a lot of fear from your conversations not that I've read every single line. The main thing is to get out there doing the things you enjoy and you will meet and come across more people, male and female.
There is bound to be sparks somewhere. The odds are in your favour, being a guy, there are more women to men in HK, they say. After all, you do need to work yourself back into having a serious LTR, right?!
If you have the right attitude, it's just a matter of time. You do need to get over your ex first though before you can dive into another relationship. My two cents worth Justin Credible Part Deux 10 yrs ago Wholly agree with dylchiu. Give time to drop baggage and also to have realistic expectations.