Quickie hookup app

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Tired of receiving rejection after rejection on dating apps because women can't stand your Hitler 'stache and your Putin charm? Then Carrot Dating is the app for you. With a promotional line pulled straight out of The Godfather " Make them an offer they simply can't refuse " , there's NO WAY your love life has taken a turn for the worse if you've got this on your phone. The way it works is almost too gross to put down on paper. Basically, you offer any "gift" you're willing to hand out on your Carrot Dating profile, and the women will come flocking to you, basking in your rays of materialism as they beg for a date so that you hand over your gift.

According to the site, if you dangle the right carrot, you can get any woman you want! You know, until someone comes along with a bigger carrot, because you searched for women on a gold-digging app in the first place. Carrot Dating "Exchanging goods for sex? How has no one thought of this before!?! The hardest thing about being bad at flirting is that it's not easy to get practice.

Let's face it -- the only people who don't fear rejection are sociopaths. That's why Flirt Planet exists: Maybe the execution is where things take a turn for the WTF. On Flirt Planet, you're given a personal avatar that you control and use to interact with artificial intelligence in the virtual world. That's right, you practice flirting by trying to seduce computer-generated cartoon girls. When you've virtually porked the computerized women Flirt Planet offers, the app will then recommend you to its partner app, Flirt Planet Meet, which is exactly the same app, except you're now testing your new skills of pressing dialogue buttons with other people who've also become good at pressing dialogue buttons.

The idea is that since you've mastered flirting with the computer, then you no doubt know exactly how to get laid with real people, which explains why everyone who's ever played a BioWare game is now a smooth-talking ladies' man.

Does the thought of flying without boning horrify you? Not to worry, the Wingman app is here to save the day! Using this site to meet other singles has been a real eye-opener, I no longer have to worry about commitment. I've used plenty of dating sites in the past, every single man I met was looking for someone long-term. I've been on the hunt to find a site which is no-strings only. Some of the guys I've met really know how to hit the spot Stuck with one person for the rest of your life?

I can barely have the same lunch every day. I've met some great gals from all over, I'm loving it! Meeting women can be a real ball ache at time, i've met a few which are not even up for a chat! A few months back I started exploring online dating sites, at first I was a little rusty, but hey, who isn't?

After sorting out my whole profile even mustering up a selfie I started to receive a few emails during the same week, I was sat on the bus when I got a message from a woman in the area that wanted to meet for sex, I was pretty gobsmacked by how forward it was, and I'm not even the looker. After a bit I started chatting to a few women who were messaging me first and I met up with this one chick that lived like 20 minutes away. If you're at an age where you feel nothing but creepy on Tinder, Match is a perfect alternative. You'll obviously have to fill out some survey questions about your likes and dislikes, so this isn't the place for impatient people.

However, it would be a good idea to let the public know exactly the type of relationship you're looking for in your bio, just to make sure it doesn't get awkward if someone wants a second date. Don't worry, it's less serious than eharmony and gives you much more freedom to clown around — we'd just suggest that you at least be open to the idea of a serious relationship after a hookup if you're gonna be on Match.

You have to test drive the car before you buy it, right? Match is also clutch because you're pretty much in control: You'll get a certain number of matches that they think you'll like per day, but you also have free reign over the search bar and can see who's nearby. This means you're able to feel out the selection and see if there are any certified hotties in your area, rather than waiting for them to give you choices or going one by one like on Tinder.

They might not have as much in common with you as your suggested matches would, but hey, does that really matter when it comes to a one night stand? Read our full Match review here and sign up here. Best for finding a sexting partner. Yes One month of Gold: One of the main differences between iHookup and the numerous other sites used for hookups is that your feed won't make you feel like you've been violated. Members actually post pictures of their faces instead of their nether regions and put effort into their profiles. It's a really nice change of pace for people who are in the mood, but not so in the mood that they need porn shoved in their face.

It's still X-rated though, don't you worry — you'll realize that when you're bombarded by gross ads. On the downside, the website is more of a Facebook for horny people than an all-encompassing hookup site.

Account Options

There aren't nearly as many ways to get involved with other horny members, and that might just be because the user base simply isn't as big. However, give it a year or two and we wouldn't be surprised if it competed with the ranks of eharmony. To see everything the site has to offer, you will have to fork over some coin: It seems kind of pricey for a site that hasn't yet made it's mark on the world, but they guarantee that if you don't get a hookup in your first three months, they'll give you three months for free.

Because the member base isn't as robust and is more spread out geographically, you might want to be a little more lenient with your mile radius when it comes to the matches they suggest. You'll probably be able to find a nearby hookup, but iHookup is a way better place for someone looking for a cute sexting partner from another country. Check out our full review of iHookup here and sign up here.

Best for people who don't know what they want. Yes One month of paid: Ever heard of "behavioral matchmaking?

4 Creepy Dating Apps That Actually Exist

Zoosk sports a flirty "pick up and go" philosophy when it comes to online dating, so they won't make you answer a torturous string of questions about yourself. Instead, Zoosk monitors your on-site activity and attempts to give you better matches based on what you already like. Zoosk offers ease and practicality and is pretty far from the Tinders of the world. Specifying the age range and gender that you're looking for in a partner does squat to narrow down your options. That might be fine for a strict hookup, but finding something past friends with benefits will require a little more help.

Considering Zoosk sees a user base of about 40 million members, getting through all profiles that match your requirements could take ages. By monitoring your swiping behavior, Zoosk can tap into your subconscious okay, not really, but sorta and give you what you want deep down, even if you don't even know why you're saying yes or no to those profiles. There is one downside we need to mention, though: The amount of fake or dead profiles makes this place seem like the dating site version of The Walking Dead.

Of course, all dating sites have their fair share of duds, but Zoosk is just feeling that plague a bit more intensely we've heard it's mostly female profiles. Luckily, you can weed these out by looking for a "Currently online" or "Recently online" status. It's not wildly pricey, and as with any dating site that you need to pay for, it's kind of nice to know that other users are somewhat serious if they're spending their money on it. Zoosk also has a coin system that allows you to boost your profile and get access to other special features, which you can read about in our full review here.

Best combo of fun and seriousness. Psst, people who are over Tinder but not yet ready to join the ranks of marriage-crazed eHarmony: OkCupid is your new best friend. This hip, LGBT-friendly site has won the hearts of millennial and mature singles alike, and we'd give it the crown for being the smartest combo of spontaneous and serious.

It's the place for, well, pretty much everyone who takes dating seriously, but still wants to have fun. Here's the thing about OkCupid: Their advertising is outstanding. They deserve endless applause just for that, but I realize many people on dating apps care about more than the aesthetics. Though OkCupid's advertisements may have "DTF" plastered all over them, the site's intentions and matchmaking process are no joke.

Forget Dating, Some Women Just Want A Quickie!

The site takes compatibility factors into account that other sites haven't even thought of. OkCupid and its user base is pretty liberal which can also translate into "sex positive". The ads with same-sex couples are an obvious giveaway, but OkCupid has snuck in other little features to weed out more conservative-minded people. This can help you avoid awkward date conversations in the future. Other sites don't go into this type of stuff much past religion, but with politics being more of a hot topic now than ever, you can imagine how torturous it would be to end up with someone who starts an argument with you every time the news is on.

It might take some time and genuine effort to make a profile, but that's what you want if you're looking for something real. You'll fill out a questionnaire with your answers as well as what you would like your ideal match to answer.

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