What to know about dating a recovering alcoholic
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Men and women learn a lot in recovery, not just about staying sober but pros and cons, the real question isn't whether you should date a recovering addict, but . But what are the unique aspects of dating a sober alcoholic? the now sober individual must relearn, or possibly learn for the first time.
Alcoholism is a chronic mental health disorder that a person usually struggles with for his or her entire life. So read a book or go through online resources about the struggles people with alcoholism have faced. Even better, ask a mental health professional about the disorder and what you can do, as a partner, to ensure that your date is able to stay on the path to recovery.
However keep in mind that alcoholics often have a reason for why they struggle with drinking so much, and recovering alcoholics may still be trying to work through those previous problems. Be understanding if your significant other isn't ready to talk about his or her past, but let them know that you will be there when they are ready.
When the time comes that he or she is willing to talk, be supportive and never judgmental. When you think you have opened the channels of communication, also share your own concerns and hesitations about being with a recovering alcoholic.
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This will bring things out in the open and your partner may be actually relieved about addressing relationship issues instead of keeping things under wraps. You should never put your partner in a position where she has to choose between remaining sober and being with you. Take all this into consideration before planning dates, family gathering, work parties or any other outing.
Learning how to navigate this disorder and how it affects romantic relationships gives you important tools which can be valuable whether your choose to continue your relationship or not. Openness and honesty is key in all relationships and especially so when one or both of the partners are sober. Contact her when you need to talk with someone who knows the specifics of the relationship and can offer support. However keep in mind that alcoholics often have a reason for why they struggle with drinking so much, and recovering alcoholics may still be trying to work through those previous problems. In some recovery circles, there is an unwritten suggestion that new romantic relationships are best avoided during the first year of sobriety. Unlike illicit drugs, which are illegal in most of the world, drinking is often seen as harmless and socially acceptable — but alcohol is anything but harmless.
At the same time, individuals who have stayed sober for many years at a stretch may be more confident of their ability to resist temptation. However others may find this too tempting and would prefer to be in other environments. Relate your differences to small conditions.
Thoughts on Living With and Loving a Recovering Addict
Being in a relationship with someone who is in recovery has opened my mind. Every girl, or man, looks for a relationship where they can be themselves, not have any secrets, have communication, and find someone who has goals. A person who has faced true adversity and has overcome it, has true perspective in life. The communication and adultness in our life is a dream come true.
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We are both really strong-headed, but we talk. We as humans make mistakes, but where we are in our lives determines how we fix them. I sit to myself and wonder what I did to be so blessed to be dating my best friend. As a person who never had a physical, spiritual, emotional, and psychological dependency on a substance, I do not comprehend everything he has gone through, but what I do know is that I am so thankful for the treatment he received, and for all of the people who have helped him find himself along his journey.
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Recovery is scary, but a blessing in and of itself. You are literally reborn and given another chance to live life as God intended you to. Skip to content Skip to primary sidebar Skip to footer. You have found the right place to embark on your personal recovery journey.
Recent Articles Jan 21, Recovery. Unlike illicit drugs, which are illegal in most of the world, drinking is often seen as harmless and socially acceptable — but alcohol is anything but harmless.
Dating a Recovering Alcoholic - Tips and Advice
That cost comes primarily from excessive drinking — bingeing on four or more drinks per evening, or drinking heavily all week long. Though the amount of alcohol consumed and the circumstances for example, in Italy, alcohol is imbibed most often along with food , it is clear that in most countries, alcohol plays a role in daily life.
So, what is a sober person to do in a world of drinkers? And, more specifically, what is dating like for both the sober person and their partner?
Thoughts on Living With and Loving a Recovering Addict
It is easy to create a list of drawbacks and reasons why it is unwise to date someone with a history of alcohol abuse the main one being: What if they relapse? This is an understandable concern and a reason perhaps for both people in the relationship to move slowly and cautiously.
This allows time for both people to get to know each other and gain some emotional intimacy before jumping into a serious relationship. Openness and honesty is key in all relationships and especially so when one or both of the partners are sober.
This is a time to learn about each other, talk about triggers, and what types of situations feel comfortable. Some recovering alcoholics have no problem if their partner drinks and feel no uneasiness going to bars or clubs where alcohol is served. For others, those situations are too risky and need to be avoided.
The early part of a relationship is learning about each other and discovering whether there is compatibility. Author Sarah Hepola wrote in an essay for Elle.
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